“Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name. Bless the Lord, o my soul, and forget not all his benefits: Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindess and tender mercies; Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle’s.”
Psalm 103:1-5

You may feel that nobody really understands how you feel and that very well may be true, however I tell you on the Authority of the Word of God that Jesus does understand!  When it comes right down to it, Jesus is the only one who can really see into the depths of our heart and know exactly what is going on inside.  He Loves you and He cares about your every breath.

I am speaking from experience!  I have suffered physical, sexual and emotional abuse in my life and I can tell you that the emotional abuse is the worse.  The scars from the physical abuse eventually fade away so that you don't really think about it that much, but the emotional scars never go away!

We are to forgive people.  God said that if we don't forgive others, He will not forgive us but He understands that it will still hurt.  I had to give all the bitterness, hurt, confusion, suicidal thoughts which I had every day for sixteen years, and the loneliness to Jesus.

It did not happen over night but when I really opened my heart to Jesus and made a heart commitment, not just a head and verbal commitment, all of my past started to fade away.  It took years to do that and He is still in the process of working on me by reassuring me, sometimes every minute of the day, how much He Loves me and cares when it seems nobody else does.

God used a beloved Pastor who has been a dear friend of mine for many years to show me how to open the door to my heart emotionally.  Pastor Byron said this statement in a sermon once and when he said it I honestly thought the man was crazy.  He said, "If you want to fly higher than a kite, start bragging on Jesus".  I started doing that. I began to tell everyone I came in contact with how great Jesus is and how much He Loves you and desires to heal your pain.

I remember once several years ago at a bus stop while waiting for the bus, there was a man sitting there waiting with me.  I was still extremely afraid of people but I finally started talking to him.  I said, "Sir, do you know how much Jesus Loves you"?

He just looked at me and didn't say anything.  It scared me so I didn't say anything else.  Five minutes later, he began to weep and said, "Do you really think it is possible for Him to love me since I have done so many terrible things in my life?"  I told him that if Jesus could love me as many crazy and mixed up and sinful things that I had done, He can love anybody.

The bus was late and we talked for twenty minutes and I had the privilege and honor of leading him to accept Jesus into his heart.  I have never seen or heard from that man again but I know that Jesus has him in the Palm of His Hand, and that is all that we can do for anyone.  Give that person to Jesus and then get out of His way and stop telling Him how to fix the situation.

January 22, 2005